Return of the Runebound Professor
Chapter 239: Tacky

Stretching went surprisingly well. Turning in the job and selling everything they’d gathered went even better. Once everything was said and done, they got paid the promised four hundred gold and set off once more.

Moxie took them back to Thaddius, the merchant that they’d visited when they’d first reached Dawnforge. He’d been delighted to see them – right up until they started haggling. Throughout the entire conversation, Thaddius pretended as if they were actively dropkicking cats through his windows.

He only let up when he and Moxie shook on a final price for everything they’d brought in – the extra Molster claws went for another hundred gold, and the hardened quills of the rabid rat-monster thing had been a solid extra two hundred.

In just the span of a day, they’d earned seven hundred gold. To the Noah of a few months ago, that amount of money seemed ridiculous. Now, even though he hadn’t actually told Arbitage he’d reached Rank 3, he was making hundreds of gold in a single day.

“That’s about three hundred for all of us and a hundred left over. We’re not rich in the noble sense of the word, but we’ve got some money if we want to spend it,” Moxie said as they left Thaddius’ shop. The merchant had promised them that he had some interested buyers and would have an auction in the coming day or two, so there would be even more money coming soon. Is there anything we need?”

Something for you. Lee got a new axe, I got a violin, but I still don’t know what Moxie would want. Using the pelt is a decent option, but I don’t even know what Imbuements to put on it.

“Food,” Lee said. She’d turned back into her human form before they’d left their inn room, likely so she could eat more. “Clothes. Not necessarily in that order.”

“What about you?” Moxie asked Noah.

He shrugged. “I’m good with whatever. I think I’ve already gotten more than what I planned to from Dawnforge. I’d be happy without anything else. The only other thought I have is collecting money to try and save up for a way to heal Todd, but it looks like Silvertide has that handled. We could always save up for some Runes or Catchpaper, but the Catchpaper will probably be handled with Karina’s catacombs, and if we want to go out and buy Runes, we’d need to find a noble trader and then get Rank 2 or 3 ones, which would be pretty damn expensive. It’ll probably be easier to just get the Runes ourselves at that point. Actually, on that matter, I do need to try to get my hands on a few more basic Runes for–”

“Noah!”

Noah blinked, looking to Moxie.

“One thing at a time, remember?”

“Ah. Right. Fell off the wagon.” Noah cleared his throat sheepishly. “One thing. Yeah. Damn. I thought I fixed that already. Let’s just go get some food or something.”

“As long as you’re aware of it,” Moxie said, shaking her head with a wry smile. “And you can’t expect to completely change the way you do everything that quickly. That’s not taking things one step at a time, is it?”

“I heard food,” Lee said, disregarding the rest of the conversation entirely. She pointed down the street and gave them an excited grin. “I smell something good that way. I bet you’ll like it, Moxie.”

“Meat pies?” Noah guessed.

Lee gave him a wide-eyed stare. “When did you get a good nose? I thought you were scent deaf.”

“Anyone is scent deaf compared to you.” Noah rolled his eyes. “Maybe I can read minds now.”

Lee scrunched her nose, then gave him an expectant look. “What am I thinking of?”

“Food. Meat pies, presumably.”

“How’d you learn how to do that?” Lee’s eyes narrowed. “Or did you always know how to read minds? That would explain a lot, actually.”

“He can’t read minds,” Moxie said, flicking Noah in the shoulder. “You’re just kind of obvious, Lee.”

“Oh yeah? I know what you’re thinking about right now.”

Moxie crossed her arms and arched an eyebrow. “Do tell.”

“Meat pies.” S~ᴇaʀᴄh the NøvᴇlFirᴇ(.)nᴇt website on Gøøglᴇ to access chapters of nøvels early and in the highest quality.

Moxie opened her mouth, then scrunched her nose in annoyance and sent him a mock glare. “Okay, but that was low hanging fruit. Not fair in the slightest.”

They all laughed and headed into the city, letting Lee lead them toward the meat pies. No matter how distasteful the end of the day was going to be, Noah didn’t see any reason not to enjoy himself for the time being.

After all, this was just taking things one step at a time.

***

While Moxie and Lee continued exploring the city, Noah spent the rest of the day in their room, playing the violin. It seemed to know his fear of alerting anyone and kept its song silent, but no matter what he tried, it still didn’t quite sound right. He was improving – Noah was sure of that – but something was still missing.

The day passed in a flash, and the sun soon gave way to the moon. Lee and Moxie returned to the room and Noah put his instrument away.

The time for fun was over – there was a group of assassins that had to be dealt with. Before they left, the three of them discussed their plan. Noah voiced his concerns over their enemies potentially being considerably more powerful than the assassins that had come after Lee, but Moxie was confident that it was unlikely they’d have anyone stronger than a Rank 3. She pointed out that Rank 4 and above Mages were already somewhat rare, so the chances of one wasting time with a bunch of thugs were incredibly low.

Just in case, Noah left his gourd in his room as they headed out. On the off chance that something did go wrong, he was confident he could buy Lee and Moxie enough time to escape. So, a very rough escape plan in place, Lee led Noah and Moxie up to the location where the people that had attacked her came from.

Noah had been expecting a shadowy, dark alley somewhere deep in the city, where nobody would ever dare entering. He would have been fine with the sewers or some other secluded base that would have better fit a group of bastards that would try to murder a young woman.

Instead, Lee brought them to a bakery.

Even though it had likely been hours since the bakers had stopped plying their craft, the scent of fresh bread and delicious sweets wafted out from within it. Beautifully crafted cakes and pies lined the insides of the windows, and there were still several loaves of bread waiting for someone to purchase them.

Both Noah and Moxie directed a look toward Lee.

“What?”

“Are you sure you brought us to the right place?” Noah asked carefully. He peered at the pies in the window. “Not doubting your nose or anything. Just making sure you didn’t get distracted.”

“Nope. This is it.”

“The place where the people that followed us came from, right?” Moxie confirmed. “Not the place that has tasty looking food.”

Lee gave them a firm nod. “Yes. The food smells good, but this is also where they came from. We can take some of their cake on the way out, though. They look tasty.”

Noah shrugged. “If you’re sure.”

He pushed the door open. It creaked, and a small bell dinged as he stepped inside. The delicious scents hit him even harder now that there wasn’t a barrier blocking them. Moxie and Lee followed him inside.

“Just one moment!” a hearty voice called from the back.

They stood in the lobby awkwardly as they waited. Noah hadn’t expected to actually get greeted by the people they were after. People that went after kids in alleyways didn’t seem like they should have been the type to have any sort of customer service.

Do I just start blasting? That seems kind of wrong. I should at least see whoever was talking, right?

Mercifully, the decision was made for him. A large, portly man stepped out from the back of the shop, wiping his flour-covered hands off on his apron. He had a small cutting knife in a sheath at his side. The baker gave them a huge smile and approached the counter.

“Welcome! It’s a bit late, but everything was baked fresh and with love today. I can assure you that we’ve put our heart and soul into all the food here. What can I get for you?”

What are the chances that Lee’s nose got tricked by the food? This guy really doesn’t feel like the type to go around murdering people.

Noah cleared his throat and glanced around the shop, searching for anything that could give him even the slightest piece of evidence that this wasn’t just a normal baker’s shop.

He couldn’t find it – not in the main room, at least. The only thing that even looked remotely dangerous in the immediate area was a large cleaver hanging from the back wall, embossed with an overlapping ‘V’ and ‘A’, presumably in homage to some chef or baker that Noah didn’t recognize.

Damn it. What am I supposed to do here? Ask if they kill people for fun?

Moxie looked equally as stuck.

“Could we have a moment to look around?” Noah asked.

“Of course. Please, don’t let me distract you. We’ll be closing pretty soon, but I don’t mind sticking around if it makes your day just a little bit better.”

Damn, this guy’s good.

Noah turned around, looping an arm around Lee’s shoulder and pulling her closer to whisper into her ear as they approached the cake rack.

“You’re one hundred percent sure this is the place?” Noah whispered.

Lee nodded. “Yeah. The smell is a lot stronger here. It’s not just the food.”

Whelp. That’s enough for me. She’s serious.

Noah straightened back out and turned back to the counter. He activated the Body Imbuements in his feet and ears, but neither was able to pick up any useful information. The floor was wood, which invalidated the first Imbuement, and the city was still too busy around him for the air Imbuement to give him good information. However, he did pick up a slight amount of motion in the ground beneath them. That didn’t mean anything beyond that the area had a cellar, but it was still information.

“Sorry about that,” Noah said. “Just had to ask her opinion on something. I was wondering if I could get yours as well.”

The portly baker laughed and nodded. “Of course. I’d be thrilled to help.”

“You ever stab anyone?” Noah asked, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I – what? I’m sorry?”

“Stab someone,” Noah said, miming thrusting a blade. “You know. Innocent people walking in dark alleyways.”

“No. I can’t say that I have, sir. What’s the point of asking such a question?”

“What about your friends?” Noah asked, ignoring the baker’s shocked expression. “They stab anyone? Because I’ve got it on pretty good word that they have. I’m holding off here, bud. Were you just the front, or are you actually part of the operation?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” The baker’s eyes darkened and he thrust a wide finger toward the door. “I think I’m going to have to ask you to leave, though. You’re not welcome here.”

Noah heaved a sigh.

“You’re making this a huge pain in the ass, you know? Can’t we just be straight with each other for a few seconds? It would be so much simpler. Save us both the heartache.”

“Get out of my shop.”

Noah glanced at Lee.

“Just how much does he smell like them?”

“Incredibly similar,” Lee said in a whisper. “They’ve spent time together, and I smell blood on the knife at his side.”

“Interesting,” Noah said. “I’ll be hair out of a moment, then. I just have one really quick question. Do you sell meat pies?”

“No, we don’t.” The baker watched Noah with his lips pressed thin, one hand resting on the hilt of his knife and the other thrust toward the door. “Leave.”

Noah drank power from Natural Disaster. The baker clearly wasn’t a powerful mage, because his expression didn’t even flicker as the energy coursed through Noah’s body and gathered within him.

This boils down to if I trust Lee’s nose or not – and that’s another way of saying I need to decide if I trust Lee or not.

I already know the answer to that question.

A pillar of lightning roared from Noah’s hands. The baker’s eyes widened for an instant. A blue shield flashed to life around him as the magic approached, but it shattered like a piece of glass and the magic slammed home.

It picked the baker off his feet and slammed him into the wall with a loud crash. He crumpled to the ground, smoking and scorched – dead before he even hit the wall. Noah strode forward and hopped over the counter.

He put his foot on the knife’s hilt and slid it free of the sheathe. Flecks of blood were splattered on the handle of a stiletto – not a baking knife by any stretch of the imagination.

“Right then,” Noah said, his eyes stormy. He walked into the back room of the shop, Lee and Moxie close behind him. Barrels of flour and other baking ingredients were stacked high along the walls, but Noah didn’t care about that. It only took him a few moments to locate a trapdoor on the ground, partially covered by a heavy sack of flour. More magic poured into his hands, gathering around his body in crackling arcs. “Let’s throw out some trash.”

Moxie shot Noah a sidelong look.

“What? Too tacky?”

“Way too tacky.”

“Whatever. Let’s kill these pricks.”

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